When:
🗓️ January 29
Where:
🌐 Everywhere
Since:
❓
Curmudgeons Day is celebrates the birthday of comedian W. C. Fields on January 29, 1880
W.C. Fields was a great source of grumpy quotes!
“I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.”
“If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.”
“You can fool some of the people some of the time — and that’s enough to make a decent living.”
“I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure.”
“Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.”
“Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.”
“There’s no such thing as a tough child – if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.”
“When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.”
“Prayers never bring anything… They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy – but to the enlightened it is the same as asking Santa Claus to bring you something for Xmas”
“When you wake up in the morning, smile – and get it over with.”
“My daughter wants to throw a stone at a bad man. I stop her from throwing, shaking my head and giving her a little slap. My disapproval is complete. You think: ‘That’s right, she shouldn’t throw a stone even at a villain.’ Then I hand her a brick to throw.”
